Well, I’ve had a chance to come down from Sunday’s marathon now and to pick myself back up. Or rather, get picked back up by friends, boyfriend and other Operation Ultra runners.
I did finish the marathon with tears in my eyes. At the time I was so disappointed with myself. Although I knew this wasn’t my goal race – you train for months and months for a marathon and my head just wasn’t right on the day and I felt like I had really let myself and others down. I know I was hard on myself on the day, but also that I wasn’t quite hard enough.
I need to learn not to be ruled by my watch or by expectations of myself or others, but to adjust goals as necessary and enjoy the journey.
I found out that one runner dropped to the ground metres from the finish and crawled over the line. Another lady collapsed not far from the line and marshals helped her up and let her run the last few strides until she also crossed the line.
I also found two photos of me by googling ‘Mablethorpe Marathon 2013′. Good old Google! Not very flattering shots unfortunately but at least I’m looking focused!
To move forward with my running again I need to take the pressure off. Kev asked of my race plans for 2014 over dinner on Sunday and I have lots I would like to try, although I don’t necessarily want to set myself goals for these. At least, not for the time being. I want to get better without the pressure of getting better. Does that make sense? To achieve it because I enjoy it.
I have no expectations of my Dusk ’til Dawn ultra, other than completing it, which I know I will do unless something goes drastically wrong on the day. After the Dusk ’til Dawn the thing I’m looking forward to most is returning to running club. It will have been four months of missed training sessions with the club and I’ve missed the social side as much as I have the group training.
I have promised to help my friend Jenny get a sub 2:20 half marathon at St. Neots three weeks after the ultra which should be achievable without being too taxing. I would also like to run our club’s five cross-country races over the Winter. I missed out on these last year as work was too busy and I had too much going on at the time but these should definitely add some fun to my Winter and come with free rolls and cake afterwards…bonus!
I’m also looking forward to attending the club’s first Halloween run on my birthday which I’ve just finished designing the banner for.
So much to come!